The Brutal Battle of the World's Most Boring Cars

Car manufacturers have their work cut out for them at the annual New York International Auto Show this week. They are tasked with quickening pulses, but the big reveals—the new models that car companies want drivers to lust after—are a pretty humdrum bunch.

It’s the spring of the milquetoast, mid-sized sedan. Chevrolet will pull the slip off its new Malibu. Kia is unveiling its latest Optima. And Nissan is rolling out an updated Maxima. Details are still scarce, but rest assured they will all be perfectly fine-looking, well-appointed, and thoroughly boring. If they were on Tinder, you would swipe right and immediately regret it, especially if you are standing near any of the supercar supermodels.